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Monday, July 25, 2011

Clowny Goes Home

Clowny [blogs 1/12/11 and 1/20/11], was in sad shape. After years of traveling on the road with the Flying Gorgonzola Brothers, he was a down trodden clown. He was broken, beaten, worn out and just plain pooped. So, he decided to sojourn on a quest to discover his roots. His mission brought him to Baraboo, home of the
  World's Largest Clown Museum
in the world!

As soon as he entered, he knew he had come home at long last. Upon arrival, he was met at the entrance by his old Uncle Milky. Milky adored Milky Ways, strawberry and chocolate milk, and sometimes Milky Ways in his strawberry or chocolate milk, so what better way to honor his memory, than a portrait on milk glass.

Next, he visited the room of extraordinary feats, and hanging above the Twisted Pretzel Clown's portrait, was a painting of his Grandfather, Grampy Zany. GZ, as they called him, could play the harmonica and keep 6 balls in the air, while juggling 3 flat tires with one leg. Not only that, his pants would raise and drop at scheduled intervals while explosions of confetti burst out of his hat. 

Clowny did his best to emulate him, but he never quite had the wag or dexterity needed for his exceptional feats.  

In room three, he discovered dear old Uncle Bumbleshoots. He was one class act. After having both of his legs broken in a runaway circus stampede, it didn't impede his rise to clown~dom. His buddy with the prancing horses, lent him a ball, and Bumbleshoots invented the one and only
 Rolling Rubber Legs Clown Brigade!   

His display was so popular, the museum had a commemorative band playing there 24/7. Clowny sat in with them for a spell, but then he moved on in search of the real reason he had come.

At long last, he found what he was searching for. In room 25, there was portrait of his dear old Ma Maw.
She used to ride the bareback horses, and tumble to and fro off of their backs onto Uncle Bumbleshoots, and back onto the horses. Clowny adored his Mother. She was the most beautiful clown in all of the circuses far and wide. 
Unfortunately, she met her fate one sad rainy day in front of a measly 30 person turn out at the Big Time Chautauqua. As she somersaulted off Rosey Girl, the favored pony, Thunder hooves, the world's largest shetland discovered Rosey's heat. He plowed over Clowny's poor Ma Maw to make beautiful ponies together with Rosie, right there in the center ring! I tell ya, it was not a pretty sight.
Clowny, only 5 years old, was doing his tumbling act in Ring 3 with Sasha and her bouncing ShiTzus. He witnessed the whole thing.

A sad memory for Clowny this day at the 
World's Largest Clown Museum,
so he pressed on to room 501.

There, in a corner, under a string of cobwebs, clowny discovered, his Poppy. 

Long forgotten, Clowny's Dad, Mr. Zippy, was once adored by all. He was a sentimental clown; one who adored children of all ages. They would flock to him to bounce on his knee. Clowny bounced on that knee many a time, but after the death of his wife combined with stock crash of 1929, Mr. Zippy disappeared into oblivion. Clowny ever saw him again.
It was rumored he took off with Trixie the Tatooed Lady to start a commune in Connecticut.

Anyway, Clowny was at long last satisfied that he had touched base with his relatives, as sad as the recollections may have been. 
We all need to go home once in a while, even if home lies in our fragile memories.

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