I was preparing food for a small get together with friends, when the Pathan showed up again.
He accused me of spending too much money on party food. I told him to mind his own business, and I kept at my prep work.
I told him, "Pathan, it's only a dinner party for 14, not a full blown event."
He retorts, "That make no difference, you must pay the tax!!!"
I came very close to pairing him along with the carrots.
Then we went to my marinated meat.
"Beef, chicken AND pork? Ohhhhhh no, you gotta pay dah taxes now. Too much protein, too much money."
I tried to slam the lids on fast, but he wouldn't move his stick.
"And look at all the condiments!!! Way toooo much to get away with a non tax situation. You MUST pay up, an pay up now, or my big stick knocks you down and I trample you with my giant Indian feet!"
"Pfft," says I, "I know you like to try to collect money seemingly for taxes, but we all know it goes direct to the Pathan account. YOU think you got the big feet? You might want to try mine on for size, I could squish you right between my toes, and then we could have another protein for din-din."
(I was really laying it on thick, even tho violence is not in my nature.)
Some how, some way, the big galoof came to his senses. All I had to do was secure a small portion of marinated beef to feed the stuffed PIG.
After his meal, he happily went back to the cabinet, where I heard him belching all night.
Next time he shows up, I shall introduce him to Tintinabulla.
That should keep him occupied for hours!