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Friday, April 15, 2011

Mark Twain and His Women

Granny had a Mark Twain doll. Now, we all know how Twain could spin a yarn 2 miles long, so I thought it was only appropriate to spin one about him..... He LOVED his women.

Realizing, I could not possibly outwit Mr. Twain with any words I set to paper, I decided to dedicate this blog to his women and the Broadway stage. In other words: I stole lyrics from great composers.

A secretary is not a toy,
no, my boy,
not a toy.
Her pad~is to write in,
and not~spend the night in.
     ~(How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying)

There is nothing like a Dame....
nothing in the world...
There is nothing you can name, 
that is anything like a Dame.
~(South Pacific)

How lovely to be a woman, the wait was well worth while.
How lovely to wear mascara...and smile a woman's smile!
How lovely to have a figure, that's round instead of flat. 
Whenever you hear boy's're what they're whistling at!
~(Bye Bye Birdie)

Chop Suey, Chop Suey,
Mixed with all the hokom and bally hooey
Some thing real and glowing grand
Sheds a light all over the land
~(Flower Drum Song)

What ever Lola wants
                                               lola gets...and little man, 
                                         Lola....wants YOU!
                                                     ~(Damn Yankees)

Isn't this the height of nonchalance,
furnishing a bed in restaurants.
Well a bit of dinner never hurt,

BUT guess who is going to be dessert?
~(Funny Girl)

One of the gals was plump and pink and purdy..
as round above as she was round below.
I could swear that she was padded from her shoulder to her heel.
But later in the 2nd act when she began to peel.
She proved that everything she had was absolutely real!

and finally.....

There's gotta be something better than this. 
There's gotta be some good reason to live.
And when I find me, some kind of life I can live,
I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna get out.
I'm gonna get up get out and live it!
~(Sweet Charity!)

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